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Calpurnia is no feral alleycat. Much like Purrseus, she’s a blue-ribbon purebred. Though raised in the (almost literal) gutters, she has come to expect a certain degree of pampering. She goes so far as to avoid the sorts of places her parents hung out—-seedy dive bars, churches, and cheap casinos.
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This distaste is briefly visible as she pushes through the sliding door. But, as quick as it appears, the look of displeasure is replaced with a cordial, indulgent smile. A different sort of mask to the one Absinthe sports but a mask all the same. After pausing to pluck a drink from a serving platter, the scientist makes her way to the seated woman.
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“Absinthe~<3!” Her voice is a kitten’s purr. “A pleasure to see you darling.” The cat at her side blinks golden eyes in greeting. After a brief pause, the woman lowers herself into a chair across from her. She takes a sip from her cup.
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She’s come here straight from a day at the lab. “I’m absolutely famished; does this hole have anything decent on the menu?” Her lips perk up as she leans across the table. Her tone grows flirty. “Aside from the eye candy, of course.”

NOTES

✦ Drinks before business[break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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She can see that irritation. It’s visible in the knitting of the other woman’s brow. And it gives Calpurnia no small amount of pleasure. If she cannot get someone to appreciate her, it’s better to be hated. At least that means you made an impression. The only sign she acknowledges that irritation is the slight upturn of her lips.
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The woman’s hand hovers over the menu for a moment before she turns to the appetizers. “You're right. What a pity.” After a moment, she abandons it. All of that grease would not agree with her. Perhaps she’ll just whip up a smoothie or quick salad when she gets home. There should still be something worth eating in the fridge. “I suppose underground would mean no health inspections.”

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As Absinthe contemplates the dingy hole, Calpurnia gently scratches her kitty’s head. The old man purrs beneath her fingers. Big golden eyes flick up toward the table where her half-emptied cup sits. The scientist chuckles, seemingly missing what Absinthe said. “What a lush you are, Purrsy.” She halves the fruity drink into an empty water glass before setting it on the floor.
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Partially because she enjoys testing dour people’s patience.

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“There were some inquests into sleep when I was with the League. Creating an army that never slept, for instance.” The capitalist gears would prefer to grind at all hours of the night after all. “But do tell me exactly what you're after”

NOTES

✦ Drinks before business[break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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Purrseus meets Absinthe’s green eyes with a slow blink. It is a sign of trust among felines, a great honor to those in the know. He offers it in hope of another drink.

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The woman listened to Absinthe with veiled interest. A violet eyebrow rises in surprise as details are laid before her. “I see.” She hums Mister Sandman beneath her breath. One hand lifts to idly swirl her glass. The liquid of the drink—apparently called a Hoenn Swirl—plays beautifully with the dim lights. Though she doesn’t immediately respond, it’s apparent gears are turning.
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Most of her thoughts, however, are devoted to figuring out why lucid dreaming is so important to Absinthe. Was it because of that jail nonsense a few months ago? An attempt to recapture that power and boundless knowledge? To pry further would likely prove fruitless. People who lived in masks were rarely the sharing sort. “I think Miss Flint is working on something of the sort.” There’s a thoughtful pause. “Honestly, I’d kill for a good night’s sleep.” Five kids made that hard some days.
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At the warning, Calpurnia’s eyes flicker to the mirror behind the bar. It’s obvious these people stick out like sore thumbs. Clothing that looks like someone trying to roleplay a criminal with the tags freshly torn off. Their heads are stiff and they cluster together like mussels on a boat. They also have Pokeballs in their hands. Not wanting to draw attention, Kelpie tries her best to keep the conversation flowing. All this hush-hush silliness just made them look suspicious.
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A heel prods Purrseus’s side as the cat turns his full attention to the feds. “You are way too good for him, honey.” Calpurnia intones to bridge the awkward silence. Shifting slightly in her seat, she tries to sign to Absinthe. Her shoulder blocks the gestures from view. She hopes the woman understands.
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“B-e r-e-a-d-y to r-u-n.” The ability to communicate this way was the only thing she thanked her mother for. That and her good looks.

NOTES

✦ Drinks before business[break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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The silly little officers remind her of rats. They scuttle to and fro in a cautious, nasty little ball. She can imagine their noses wrinkling as they seek out a slice of moldy cheese. But, like most inadequate men, they felt compelled to throw their weight around. Fortunately, dealing with those who celebrated inadequacy was her specialty.
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The conversation of taps ends in a simple nod. But she had just gotten here. Maybe she would push it a little further. Try to figure out just what these little wildcards were after.
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As the man approaches, Calpurnia makes a show of being unaware. But she watches each step in the mirror. She can see the way he drags his left foot. When she turns, there’s a little ‘o’ of surprise. The man’s accent isn’t Hoennian native. And his dirty emerald eyes are lecherous. But the man’s also not the sharpest tack in the room. To be fair, not many men are.

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Calpurnia shifts in her chair. She hums thoughtfully. Violet eyes shift to Absinthe. Her tone turns indulgent, embodying some stereotypical feminine weakness. “Isn’t she—?” This little vermin was too close for her comfort. An extended foot or hand could ruin any plans of a clean getaway.

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The woman shrinks under the man’s gaze. There’s almost fear as she tosses a glance at Absinthe. “No, no. That’s Madame Irene.” She offers up a smile. “Sorry, love.” A hand clutches nervously at the table top. Almost comically obvious about it, she lets her gaze flicker to the space beneath the table. The area where Purrseus lays, obscured by the cheap, stained tablecloth.

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Hopefully, the silly sausage took the bait.

NOTES

✦ Bingo: Wildcard, Hoenn, Emerald, Celebrate [break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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The cat’s dual-colored eyes burst with psychic energy. The Hypnosis drops the man like a sack of potatoes. As they run, Calpurnia gestures to the man’s waistband. Its spring tail hooks around the handle as the fat cat makes a dash for the exit.
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Around them, the bar erupts into chaos. The bartender has a gun in his sausage fingers. Tables are overturned by the bullish agents as they rush toward the troublemakers. Calpurnia is halfway across the room when Absinthe gets hit. Violet eyes narrow to slights. That man was most assuredly a cad and a bully. “And allow you to play Little Miss Martyr, love?” She shook her head. “I think not.”
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As the Dragalge emerges, the scientist locks eyes with her cat. This glance is enough to engender some sort of understanding. With a flick of his tail, he sends the firearm spinning toward Calpurnia. She scoops it up without a second thought. Though unfamiliar with the weapon, she knows to keep the muzzle pointed away from her.

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With a yowl, the overweight cat turns back to their attackers. His keen eyes can still manage to make out shapes in the dark. His Sucker Punch knocks Absinthe’s attacker off his feet. He then meets the charge of the man’s Sneaseler head on. His trainer, meanwhile, flails through the smoke until she grabs what feels like a woman’s hand. It’s certainly not the ugly mitts of one of the officers.

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If successful, Calpurnia would start pulling her toward the door and into the river of escapees.

NOTES

✦ Let's go [break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE

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“Purrsy, be a love and throw them off our scent.” The scientist hisses to her cat as they burst out the front door. Smoke streams out behind them.
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Calpurnia pulls them around the corner and into the nearby square. She encourages Absinthe to plaster herself against the wall. Her big cat takes off to the right and away from them. Like most hounds, the men are quick to follow the sway of a cat.

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Poor thing’s a wreck. The scientist is surprised when the other woman begins to shake. Normally cool eyes soften. “Unfortunately, that’s part of their job description.” Manicured hands give Absinthe’s hand a squeeze in return. While she thought the woman a little bratty, there was no reason not to be a decent human being. Last she checked, no one was charging for that. And they had just been victim to brutish thugs. A thing most women could take solidarity in.
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“It was my pleasure.” She’s sad she didn’t have a chance to kick one of the bastards in the balls. As the women separate, Calpurnia lets her eyes sweep over the crowd in front of them. The keening of the poison type earns a wrinkle of the nose but no outward comment. “We’ll have to take a raincheck, won’t we?” Her lips perk up almost flirtatiously.
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Kelpie stays in lockstep with the other woman until they reach a fork in the road. “Great minds, hm?” With a wave, the scientist turns away from Absinthe. She trusts Purrseus will find her when the heat’s off of his tail. Her baby boy was resourceful that way.
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She pauses. “I do hope you find what you’re looking for.” Hopefully, the name dropping helped. Her lot always needed lab rats new test subjects.

NOTES

✦ Let's go [break]

Calpurnia Kubrick[break][break]

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- n/a

MADE BY GUNSMILE